Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Saturday.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Made a very long killing spree.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Survived Friday.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Wore all three outfits.
Survived Wednesday.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Survived Tuesday.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Totaled 30 cars.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Sucked down your own piss.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Gained your first dog helper.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Kicked open a door.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Reunited with an old friend.